Home Assignment

This is a post I’ve been wanting to write for months but just haven’t had the mental energy to put together.  Now that I am feeling mostly better, I am having to seriously begin thinking about our home assignment plans for 2016.  A number of people have asked about our home assignment and what it will entail exactly.  Since this will be our first ever home assignment, we can’t be sure of precisely how it will all unfold, but our general understanding is as follows:

We left for Africa in January of 2013 and embarked on our first three-year assignment with Africa Inland Mission.  With AIM, missionaries receive home assignment time which is based on the length of their overseas assignment.  So for us, three years in Africa means eight months on home assignment.  Home assignment, also known as furlough, will begin for us in January of 2016.  We will spend our 8 months visiting supporters, supporting churches, family and friends, attending conferences and occasionally being AIM representatives if there have been requests for AIM personnel in nearby churches.  During the spring of 2016, Jonathan plans to finish his Masters’ degree with Liberty Online and we will attend his graduation in Lynchburg, VA sometime in May.  We also plan to visit our dear friends in Mexico during our home assignment.  We have about 50 supporters and five supporting churches which spread across the whole country.  It is our goal to visit as many of our supporters as we possibly can, as we truly believe they are our partners in ministry.  With the addition of our new daughter, we will have some additional support to try to raise during our time home.  And lastly, for the first time since our honeymoon, Jono and I hope to take an anniversary trip alone sometime next summer.

For traveling around the US, visiting churches, supporters, etc, we have a home assignment fund that is being funneled into each month.  It pays for our tickets home, our travel, our tickets back to Africa.  We will still live on support for our normal life expenses during all our traveling.  Our plan is to base ourselves in Aiken, which is where we have the most family nearby and where the majority of our supporters live.  Also, three of our supporting churches are in the Southeast.  Because our sending church is in Illinois, we will travel and spend significant time there, probably around the time of their missions conference.  Another of our supporting churches is in Missouri where Jonathan’s parents are living, so we will spend time there as well.  Our goal is to maintain some level of normal life for our family, so we hope to use Aiken as a home base and do the majority of our travels leaving from and returning there.  Any of our supporters who would enjoy coming to us, we will gladly try to host in Aiken.

Currently our two major needs are a place to stay while in Aiken, as well as a vehicle.  In order to keep our house in Africa, AIM will continue to pay rent for us throughout our time in the States.  Thus, our available funds for trying to actually rent a home or apartment in Aiken are insufficient, besides the fact that we have no furniture.  We are certainly willing to pay what we can and we are praying something will present itself to us.  If you know of someone who has a place where we could stay or rent, please send me an email or a Facebook message.  Understanding that eight months is a long time and that five people are quite a lot, we are willing to move around some if we have a few options.  My parents have a van we can use which will hold all our carseats.  But that will leave my mom carless.  So, if you have or someone you know has a car my parents could borrow, then we will primarily use my parents' van.  We appreciate prayers in both of these areas.

The future plan, although not written in stone yet, is to come back to Africa in Aug of ’16 for a follow-up 2-year assignment.  We have approval from our local leadership, it only needs to be confirmed by our US AIM office. We’d like to come right back to Mokhotlong, spend two years trying to establish TEE in various outlying villages and establishing leadership for those groups.  Eager interest by pastors and church people in two nearby villages has recently necessitated Jonathan starting a new group. The interest and desire for TEE in this area is widespread. We will need to turn all groups over to local leadership before we can depart for good, or TEE won’t continue without us.  The main issue with the local leadership is transportation.  While many local pastors who will graduate from the first TEE class (should graduate before we leave in Dec) would be willing to lead a group in an outlying village, they don’t have cars.  So getting to and from is a serious issue.  That will be our main objective when returning- trying to establish a system so that those groups can perpetuate themselves.

It is sort of hard to believe that we’re halfway through our third year already.  It has been great and long and hard and fun.  I’m so excited, though, to be home for a while.  I believe we all need it.  I think Kyle will be able to actually remember America after those months, and I think he needs that for establishing his little identity.  I also think it will help him to bond with his grandparents and cousins and feel like a part of a bigger family.  The other day I asked him if he was an American boy.  Almost in defense, he replied, “No, I’m an African boy.”  And I’m glad that he feels confident here.  But he also needs to know that he is American and has those roots as well.

I’m looking forward to being nearby friends, my sisters and sisters in law- to feel like I’ve got girlfriends again.  I’m looking forward to being able to drive!!!  I’m looking forward to dressing Ellee up pretty and taking her out just the two of us.  I’m looking forward to celebrating the kids' birthdays with family!  I’m looking forward to church in my own language and nursery, getting to sing and listen and enjoy a service without my kids at my feet.  I’m looking forward to eating chicken salad from about ten different places.  I’m looking forward to making some crafty things!  I’m looking forward to hugging my brother, Ryan.  It will have been three years, which feels like a very long time.  I’m looking forward to visiting all my grandparents, whom I miss terribly.  I’m looking forward to seeing so many familiar faces and places which are so dear to my heart.  I’m looking forward to our whole family getting to meet Sadie while she is still a baby!

My kids are not going to believe we'll be 10 minutes rather than 4 hours from McDonalds!

~Abby

Thank You

Over the past months, Jonathan and I have been on a wild ride known as support raising.  God, in His goodness, brought in our support so quickly compared to many other missionaries we know who are raising support.  When I look back at the months that were covered up with phone calls, e-mails and meetings, I thank God for orchestrating it at just the right time.  In early October, it looked as if we were too far away to make our January departure date.  Then over just two weeks, we watched the flood gates open and the differences grow smaller.  We were cleared to leave despite a slight shortage on our monthly support and we haven't looked back since, except to recount the faithfulness of our God who provided at exactly the right time.

My extreme sickness with this pregnancy started in mid-October.  We didn't have one more support meeting after that.  If our support had not been raised before that point, I do not see how I could have physically handled trying to coordinate or attend meetings.  I praise God for raising our support before I got so sick.

Now, as I sit in a hotel room the night before I depart for Africa, I am once again amazed.  A simple post on Facebook notifying our many prayer warriors of the remaining monthly shortage has prompted more families to commit to support us monthly as well as donate one time gifts.  We are overwhelmed.  We are fully supported.  When I look at the list of people who represent so many thousands of dollars and countless prayers, I am moved to tears.  Words cannot express what I feel in my heart.

At times I begin to feel like it's just us going out to do this.  And I lay awake at night and wonder if I am crazy.  Who up and leaves their family to move to a remote town in the heart of Africa?  Who takes their child a world away from his grandparents, not knowing what kind of communication we will be able to maintain?  Who spends weeks making trips back and forth to the Goodwill only to look at the trunk of a car and realize, "this is all I own"?  Who takes a shower wondering if this is the last hot water I'll enjoy for years?  I really do feel crazy.  Maybe I am!  But, there are a lot of crazy people behind us who are cheering us on.  And I am once again reminded that I'm not the only one making sacrifices.  A long list of faithful believers are praying and giving on our behalf so that Africa might see the light of Christ and be changed for eternity.

My sweet sister in law wrote a song called "I Will Go."  If I were tech-savy, I could link it to this page.  I am not.  However, I can copy the words so you can understand why this song is so special to us.  She wrote it in high school after reading about the martyrs of the faith.  When Jonathan and I first began writing about our mutual interest in missions, he e-mailed me the file of this song.  My 17 year old heart could barely comprehend the wisdom behind the words in the second verse.  Now I understand.  And now I have to look deep down into my mother's heart as I sing these words, to test and see if what I am saying is true.

Lord, do I love you enough?

Enough to sacrifice every other love?

And Lord, am I willing to stand 

On my own, and place my dreams in your hands?

My desire is to the walk narrow road

And if suffering is where you've called me,

Father, I will go

I will go, I will do

What I know has come from you

I will say what you command me to say

I choose your way

Lord, I will go

Lord, it easier now

To pledge my hopes and dreams to you

To make a vow

But, Lord, it will not always be

For one day you may bless me with a family

And I'll desire to hope and dream for them

So I pray you will give me strength

To say once again,

I will Go

And if you call me unto death,

I will not hold on to life

But willingly I'll choose your way

And I will go

I will go

Father, here I am

Despite the ache I feel and the struggle I now know as a mother and protector of my children, I can still say, "I will go."  However, if it weren't for all of you, I wouldn't be able to go.  So, thank you.

Until Africa,

~Abby

Wednesday

The week after we left candidate training at Africa Inland Mission in February, we saw the breakdown of our needed outgoing expenses.  The $37,000 bottom line nearly made my jaw hit the floor.  I had guessed that $15,000 sounded like a plenty large enough number to have to raise, on top of thousands of dollars worth of monthly support.  We were thinking that monthly support, requiring churches and believers to commit to a constant withdraw from their bank accounts in order to supply our needs, would be the most difficult thing to raise.  Looking at a that five digit figure made us change our minds.  "Where exactly does $37,000 come from," I thought.  We certainly didn't have it to offer and didn't know where we would encounter that kind of money.

Of course, we didn't expect to find it from one source.  We've made many contacts and faithfully, the Lord has provided through an abundance of sacrificial gifts.  Also, because we don't receive any financial support from AIM until we leave for the field, our monthly supporters who have begun sending to AIM already have helped grow our outgoing account significantly.

A large miscommunication happened over the past months as we have been trying to track the amount of money being donated to our account.  Of course, we've received many gifts which we have passed along to AIM to be deposited into our outgoing fund.  But, when gifts are given online, or as monthly support is sent straight to AIM, we have a more difficult time tracking our financial status.  So, over the past months, as we have prepared to send out our update letters, we have asked our "go-to" person at AIM the balance of our outgoing expenses.  Each month we received a percentage.  And each month we have been blown away at the increase from the past month.  Well, it wasn't until last week that we realized that the percentage we had been given didn't include the car I mentioned in my last post.  We knew about the car, so we thought our percentage included that large fund also.  But, alas, we were being quoted the percentage without the car.  Two weeks ago, we thought we were at 96% on our outgoing expenses.  Then, once we uncovered the miscommunication, we went back to about 55%.

I was shocked.  Jonathan was shocked.  We didn't know exactly where the communication break down happened and it didn't really matter.  What mattered was that $17,000 was still left to be raised in less than two months and we were determined.  Although, I admit to saying, "so much for leaving in January" and crying hard for about five minutes.  Lacking $17,000 and knowing it has to come in within less than two months is an overwhelming feeling.  I like to stay on top of things and I don't like feeling completely helpless.

We made a large number of contacts that night.  We prayed that night.  We set what we thought was a very lofty goal of $10,000 for this month.  Maybe we have a lack of faith since we weren't praying for every penny this month.  We figured, $10,000 this month, $7,000 next month.  I felt crazy praying for that amount of money to come in over a few short weeks.

On Tuesday I received a call from an old friend of Jonathan's family.  I've heard his name over and over again and somewhere in the recesses of my mind I knew that he lived in North Augusta.  He had read in Jonathan's parents' newsletter that we were still in need of financial support in order to move to Africa.  He is on the leadership board of his small church in N. Augusta and was asking if Jonathan could come Wednesday to their leadership meeting.  With less than 24 hours notice, Jonathan's boss graciously let him off of work over the lunch hour to attend that meeting.  He shared with those four men about our heart and plans for ministry in Africa.  He shared our needs and our desire to leave in January.

Jonathan came home from that meeting Wednesday encouraged by the interest expressed by the men with whom he had spoken.  We were excited to see how the Lord would use this unexpected contact to answer our prayers.  That evening, we received a phone call asking where they could send a $5,000 check.

My jaw nearly hit the floor..... again.

Wednesday night, I overheard Jonathan tell Kyle as he put him to sleep, "Okay, buddy, we don't have to pray for $10,000 any more.  Now we only have to pray for about $3,000."  Kyle folded his hands and the two of them proceeded to pray for the remainder of our goal.

It is not even the middle of the month and our prayers are already being answered.  Not including that check, over the past two weeks ~$2,500 has been given in one time gifts.  Is it too greedy to now start praying for the whole remaining amount this month so we can rest peacefully next month? :) Lord willing, about $3,000 comes in for our monthly support.  So, we are past our goal of $10,000 for this month.  $5,000 + $2,500 + $3,000 (October monthly support) + $3,000 (November monthly support) = $13,500.  We might as well move on to praying for another $3,500, see from where God brings that, be done with the $17,000 all together and throw a party.

Our remaining monthly support is down to $450/month.

Even when our faith is small and our prayers are weak, He is faithful to answer us.  "If we are faithless, he remains faithful." 2 Timothy 2:13

Keep praying, folks.  Our God is answering!

~Abby

As Time Continues...

...I feel like I am standing still.  Actually, I sort of feel like I'm moving backwards.  I had high hopes a few months ago that this month of October would be a relaxing one before I had to begin packing in November.  I've lost all hope of that.

Less than three months from now we hope to be in Africa.  And before last week, that was seeming more and more like a fact and less and less like a hope.  Now, there is one thing standing in our way.  There is a word that makes people squirm in their seats.  There is one thing that I am increasingly tired of talking about.

Money.

Over the past months, I have gotten very used to discussing money and our needs in order to move to and serve in Africa.  I'm still tired of it, but at least it has gotten easier.  And I have seen God provide for our support through many unsuspecting avenues.  And yet now, as we sit a little over a month and a half from the financial cut off date for leaving in January, I see the dollar signs and my faith seems as big as a grain of salt.

To me, our monthly support seems so close and yet so far away.  We have about $550/month that still remains.  A few weeks ago, we were much closer to being set on our monthly support.  Now we have second Baby Saint on the way and our monthly requirements went up.  I am trying not to be anxious about that and trust that God knew we would be expecting at this time and He will provide for our needs.

Our outgoing expenses have been a big headache.  For starters, the ~$37,000 target was like sticker shock at its worst.  About $22,000 of that covers everything we need in order to move to Africa, including our medical exams, shots, support mail outs, airfare, extra baggage allowances, language acquisition course, house set up (to furnish our rental home) and appliance set up (since rentals don't come with any), our orientation school, and I think that is about all.  On top of all that, we also have to purchase a rough and tumble vehicle for traversing the Lesotho mountains.  That's an additional $15,000, which includes the $2,000+ in taxes we get to pay for it.  Right now, we have everything except for the car fund covered.  That means we still have around $15,000 more that has to be raised before we can be cleared to leave.


Both our monthly and outgoing numbers seem high to us.  I've had people tell me that I shouldn't feel guilty about the amount of money it requires to be a foreign missionary and that I shouldn't expect to survive on next to nothing simply because we live on "other people's money."  We don't look at it as other people's money; it's God's money.  We understand that people give to the Lord and the Lord provides for our needs.  I've also heard it asked why our targets are where they are since the cost of living in Africa is significantly lower than it is here in the US.  The only way I can explain it is, as missionaries, there are many things within our budget which wouldn't be necessary for the average American.  For instance, we have to put a significant amount of money away each month to eventually bring our family back for furlough.  We also have to pay a ~12% administration fee to cover the services AIM's offices provide for us.  And we have factored into our budget money to cover ministry expenses like regular country-wide travel.
I will say that although the numbers seem high, when I see the itemized list, I understand perfectly why so much money is required.  Believe it or not (and I didn't), the ~$1,000 allotted in our outgoing for medical expenses appears to be less than we're gonna need for physical exams, blood work and shots for just Jonathan and me.



I like a plan.  I like to be prepared well in advance.  I like all my ducks to be in a row.  Having no idea where the money is going to come from puts me in a tough situation.  How many times have I heard, "God is never in a hurry, but always on time"?  While I believe that, I have a really hard time accepting it.  I don't want to be nervous on Thanksgiving that our money isn't going to be there on December 1st.   I'm finding it nearly impossible to not be anxious about where the money is going to come from.

We really are trusting that God will provide in time.  We have to because we can't wait until December 1st to begin getting shots, packing up our apartment, planning what we'll need to take or leave behind.  We are planning to move out of our apartment in the middle of December to save on rent since we'll be traveling a lot between the holidays and visiting with our families before we move.  Another reason it all seems so unnerving is that for over a year I've been anticipating a move in January.  Now that things look unsure, I'm struggling as I try to prepare to leave everyone without really knowing if we'll be leaving then.  The remaining funds seem like a giant cloud following me around daily.  We are praying big things and expecting big answers.  Will you join us?

~Abby
**I wrote this blog on Tuesday.  Then Wednesday happened.  To be continued.....**

Confessions of a Support Raising Missionary

Many times in my life I've heard it said "sometimes the process is more important than the product."  Maybe that is the case when it comes to support raising.  The process is trying, encouraging, discouraging and exciting all at the same time!  In this post, I won't focus on the discouraging part too much, maybe that will be for another post many years down the road.  But, for now, I've got so many thoughts about support raising swirling around in my head, I've just got to spell them out.

For about as long as I can remember, I have been raising money for something.  As an elementary-aged child, I spent my spring months walking door to door with my daddy, asking for donations for the local pregnancy care center.  If I remember correctly, the first year I participated in the Life Walk, where walkers raise sponsors in return for a commitment to "Walk for Life"on a Saturday morning, I believe I raised about $500.  That was a significant amount of money for a seven-year-old.  At that time I had no trouble walking around our neighborhood and other close-by subdivisions, knocking on every door and asking for donations towards my cause.  I think people probably just humored me, a scrawny blonde girl on their door step asking for money to help save babies.  What choice did they have?  Nearly everyone would sponsor me at least a dollar.  Every year, in each age group, there was a prize for the participant who raised the most money.  I think I placed third my first year, but I don't remember what I won (obviously it wasn't very exciting).  The next year, I determined to win the first prize for my age bracket, a new bike, and set my goal at $2,000.  I put I don't know how many miles on my tennis shoes that spring.  My precious daddy, it brings tears to my eyes to think that he walked door to door so faithfully with me, and together we raised $1,700.  I just missed the first prize (if only I could've made my $2,000 goal!), but he took me straight to Wal-Mart that afternoon and let me pick out whichever bike I wanted.  Okay, within reason.  I chose a shiny blue mountain bike complete with hand brakes and gears; I was probably the proudest bike owner you could've ever known!

A couple years after that, I got involved in Relay for Life with the American Cancer Society.  I believe I set my goal that year for $500 and with a very generous donation from a neighbor, I exceeded that goal by about $200.  I took a break after that, until I spent the last few months of my senior year of high school again raising money for the American Cancer Society by flocking people's yards with plastic flamingos.  In order to get the flamingos taken back out of your yard, you were asked for a donation of $25 and then you could chose whom to send the flock to next.  It was sneaky and exciting (I'm not sure I like what that says about me) and I used many gallons of gas running all over town nearly every evening just past dark.  It is a wonder no one called the police on us for trespassing.  I have no idea how much money our team produced from flocking, but it was a lot!

As Jonathan and I began raising support to move to Mexico, he did most of the communication with our potential supporters.  Having lived on support before during his time traveling with Life Action, and being raised in a family who lived on support his whole life, he was more familiar with the process of monthly support than I was.  Thus, most of our supporters were from our church in Illinois where he was living at the time.  For Mexico, we had a much smaller budget because we weren't with an organization, we didn't have much in work funds to raise, we were childless, and we didn't have to plan to return home on painfully expensive plane tickets.  Now, raising our budget (though still reasonable in comparison to other missionary budgets I've heard of for families four times our size) seems like much more of a daunting task. 

Since we have been living in SC for the past two years, we've made many more connections with people here.  While they are just getting used to this guy who swooped in from Mexico and married me right out of high school, the people here are still "my people."  And since J is covered up with school and work, I have been doing the vast majority of making contacts for meetings.  We learned one thing during our first round of support raising - letters don't work.  We tried sending letters to over 120 like-minded churches while we were support raising for Mexico.  We heard back from about three, all saying they weren't interested.  Most never responded at all.  We nixed that idea right then.  For decades now, the conventional way to raise support has been to visit churches.  You're supposed to call the church, try to set up a time to meet with the pastor or missions committee, hope to get invited to speak in a service, and wait to see if the church takes you on for support.  While there is nothing necessarily wrong with this approach, there are many drawbacks.  It is time-consuming, puts thousands of miles on your car while draining your gas tank, and many churches have a specific point during the year that they plan their budgets, so you have to wait until that time rolls around before you can get any numbers.  There are positives to church support raising (all of which I won't spell out here) but the main one in my perspective is - they are reliable.  Once you are in the budget, you are going to get your check each month.  With individuals making up the majority of your support team, it is more likely for your support to fluctuate since you might "fall through the cracks" so to speak and the checks aren't always as dependable.  Anyway, back to our approach at support raising; we were advised to personally contact as many people as we know reasonably well and tell them about our plans and needs.  This sounds bold and daring and awkward.  Yes, it is extremely awkward.  It makes an extrovert like myself want to shrink into a hole and camp out for a week.  It is a lot more difficult to ask for money for yourself than it is to ask for money for someone or something else.  Maybe I have lost some of my inhibitions of asking people for money, or maybe it's because I'm not nearly as cute as I was when I was eight and people aren't as willing to shell out money to me.  Whatever the reason, it is awkward.  Really awkward.  I loathe the process altogether.  

I keep finding myself thinking "soon this will be over" and "maybe it gets easier the longer you do it."  Well, it is getting slightly easier as we are getting more comfortable talking about the word that makes people squirm in their seats - money.  And as our target departure date is approaching, it seems we are feeling more of the time crunch and are beginning to care less about how awkward it is and more about how absolutely necessary it is that we get our finances raised by December 1st.  But, the thought occurred to me not long ago..... Support raising probably won't end for us.  I don't really see it ending - ever.  Sure, if everything is together, we will be on our way at the beginning of next year.  However, in all likelihood, we will lose a supporter or two while we are on the field for various reasons.  And we'll be forced to attempt support raising from the field or pick it back up when we return for furlough.  We also, of course, want to have more children and children cost money.  As I have talked to another sweet friend who is support raising (Hi, M!) and we've discussed our futures, children and so on, we both agree that it is terrible to see children in part as "another return ticket."  Meaning, the more children we have, not only does it cost more to live, it will cost more to return back to the States for vacation or furlough.  Of course, we will trust God with our family and our support needs; but the reality is, we will be raising support from now until we leave the field for good.  Since Jonathan and I don't have any date within the next few decades in mind for that, there is no end in sight for me.  Or you! ;)

I said I wouldn't focus on all the discouraging aspects of support raising and I won't.  Instead I will focus on what has encouraged our hearts the most.  After spending many evenings making phone calls and meeting with our brothers and sisters in Christ, sharing our needs and plans, it is so exciting to have someone contact us for a change.  It is hard to maintain a right spirit when all that stands between us and Africa is money.  It is hard not to see people as just money and to keep in perspective that God has ordained a specific team to come alongside us and uphold us during our time in ministry.  It is so exciting and encouraging to see Him not only use many of the people we have contacted, but also to lead others, many of whom we wouldn't have contacted on our own, to contact us and express sincere interest in our ministry and needs.  It seems that as soon as I start to feel like we're going around in circles, we're being blown off or we're never going to get all the funding we need to leave, another person contacts us and says something like, "we have been praying and feel the Lord leading us to help to support you.  Where can we send money?"  We are giddy every time another family commits to support us, no matter how "large" or "small" the commitment is, because we can see progress.  And we can feel the heartfelt support of our friends and family who we know aren't giving because we have asked them but rather are giving and praying because they have felt the Spirit leading them to do so.  We also love to watch our little chart go up.  As we inch by sometimes even in the decimals of a percentage, it is exciting to reach a new number.  I expect to shed a few (okay, probably a ton) of tears when we reach 100% and we are cleared to leave in January.

Living with the pressure of expecting to leave our friends and family in just a few short months, but not knowing for sure if it will be five months or nearly another year, along with trying to raise copious amounts of needed funding, as well as completing all the necessary paperwork and preparation requirements which come with trying to move around the world, at times makes me feel like I'm going to burst wide open.  Really, sometimes I feel like it is too much to handle.  Remember when I said I wished I could take all my loved ones with me?  I still wish that.  As the days keep racing past, I feel my heart increasingly aching in anticipation of saying goodbye.  Well, I also wish that all of the money we still need would just fall like manna from the sky.  But, I am trusting that the process maybe, just maybe, is more, or at least as important as the product.

Throw back picture - a year ago almost to the day.  Little baby Kyle sporting his safari jammies and hangin' with Changito, already preparing for Africa!

~Abby